By Featured Speaker Davida Shensky
The problem is that there is a conflict between both your conscious and your conscious mind. Your conscious mind tells you that you can succeed in your unconscious mind has a list of all of the reasons why you can’t succeed. Therefore, you have to read training your thinking and your behavior so you can succeed. 10% of our thoughts are conscious and 90% of thoughts are unconscious, therefore, it is our unconscious thoughts back control how far we go in life and the ability we have you succeed at anything we choose to do.
For instance, traditional success programs tell you these are the four steps you should follow to find success in your personal life:
- Set your goals (know what you want)
- Do something (take action to reach your goals)
- Evaluate (am I getting closer to my goals are not?)
- Try again (keep changing your approach until you reach your goals)
but the reality is:
- One is in a fog (one is not sure what you really want)
- Treadmilling (one is really really busy but not really getting anywhere)
- Feel like a failure (one is always comparing oneself to others)
- Try again (we keep trying the same thing over and over again thinking we will get results)
Once you recognize how US sabotaging yourself from success and first recognize that you lack self confidence and work on learning to have to love yourself first, then set out a strategy to build success, then and only then will you find yourself reaching the goals you really want.
Here are some other things to consider, for instance our parents never reach the goals they have for themselves, therefore, they are trying to relive their lives through their children. Even going so far as to expect their children to have an interest in the same career their parent did and expect the child to follow in their footsteps in the business world rather than letting the child to what they really love to do.
Here are some steps that you should take and also learn to recognize how they can help you:
1. Look at all of the statements that you hear in your head that are negative and write them down and change them to positive statements about yourself. Repeat them over and over again until you begin to believe them. Also recognize that what is your natural behavioral strengths which are different from someone else, therefore, what make him easy to you may be hard for them and vice versa.
2. Loving mirrors and safe havens — how you see yourself is very different from how others see you, we all wear a mask at one time or another but we need to learn who we really are in love that person inside us. For instance, tell your little child inside you that you will take care of it and nothing bad will happen.
3. Systems of support — have a group of people around you who love you and respect you in the same way that you love and respect yourself, because they will help you reach your goal and be your mastermind group whom you can balance ideas off of to make sure you are on the right track.
4. Where do goals fit into your life — that is how can you reach the goals you set for yourself with confidence and reassurance.
5. Who am I trying to protect, punish all please? The answer to this should be yourself and not your parents because they are thinking of themselves rather than thinking about you or what it is that you love to do.
6. Find your No — because we don’t want to disappoint anyone we will often say yes to something that we do not want to do and we need to learn to say no unless it is something that we really want to do.
7. Find your because which isn’t your personal mission in life. Each one of us are unique and have qualities that are unique to us. For instant some people are really great athletes, while others are great professional speakers, and others are good at helping other people succeed at their endeavors. Therefore, you should be true to yourself and not live your life according to what others expect of you.
Finally, success starts with yourself, first by learning to love yourself, then by learning what your strengths and weaknesses are, then learning how to merge both your unconscious and your conscious thoughts so you can succeed at anything that you choose to do. Remember, currently we are in a down economy where people are looking for gainful employment instead of looking for something that they are passionate about and then making a business out of it because they fear that they can succeed rather than looking at themselves as being successful at anything they choose to do that they really love to do. Only you can make that choice for yourself the site to succeed and build a strategy for success and follow it or you can continue on the road that you are currently and continue to be jealous of what someone else has instead of being happy with who you are and what you have.
Davida Shensky is a professional speaker, trainer, and author of many E-Books and articles. Her specialty is helping clients reach their maximum potential in life and create their own success in life. She has written the book No One Stands in Line to Become Disabled. Through her company Career Performance Institute she offers offers teleseminars, webinars, mentoring programs or bootcamps, advocacy, career, life, organizational, and technology coaching.
She holds an AAS in Mental Health and BA in Psychology and attended a Masters program in Rehabilitation Counseling. She attended Toastmasters where she received both the CTM and ATM certifications and participated in the NSA-GA Chapter mentoring program. She attended the American Seminar Leaders Association University where she received the Certified Seminar Leader (CSL) certification. She attended Stores Online presentation to learn about Internet Marketing. She has used her real life experiences to established a NPO — International Disabled Entrepreneurs, Inc. (IDE, Inc.) to teach people with disabilities the skills needed to have their own business, resources on where to purchase equipment, and low interest loans.
Ms. Shensky’s company is Career Performance Institute through which she presents teleseminars, webinars, boot camps, advocacy, career, technology organizational, and life coaching. plus written the book No One Stands in Line to Become Disabled.