By Featured Speaker Davida Shensky
Personal growth only happens when you recognize that you have low self-esteem. One is supposed to love their parents simply because they are your parents. The problem is as children we offer unconditional love because we expect to be loved in return. It is only as we begin to mature and recognize that what one is experiencing at the hands of their parents, is truly abuse. Just because your mother is your mother, does not give her the right to mistreat you as a child, or even a teenager, and even then after you achieve adulthood. The problem is that she may hate herself and is only treating you the way she expects to be herself. One loves their parents, but that does not mean you like the way that parent treats one. Unless one’s parents are willing to seek help with one as a family, the best thing you can do is distance yourself from them once you achieve adulthood.
As you start to change and grow, but your relationship with your parents remains toxic, the best thing you can do for yourself is to stay is our way from them as possible. One can not change their family unless they are willing to make the changes themselves, but once you change and refuse to accept their behavior in your life, then the best thing one can do for themselves is to stay away from that toxic environment, because they will continually try to pull you back and sabotage all the work you have done for yourself. The problem is when someone lacks self-esteem, they are jealous of anyone else who was successful, and specially family members, and refuse to let you be successful.
There are books that you can read to teach you how to change negative thoughts into positive ones, or rather, how to learn to love yourself and retrain one’s thoughts through affirmations. Here are some affirmations one can repeat to themselves until one believes them and could repeat them to themselves on consciously:
- I love and respect myself all the time.
- I can achieve anything that I set my mind to.
- I can have a good and positive relationship in work and in my personal life.
- I can have a successful business for myself doing what I love to do.
- I will show abundant love to all my friends and family.
- When I talk to people I will only make good remarks about them.
- When I see someone in need I will offer them assistance if it is in my power to give it.
- When I achieve success I will give back to help someone else become successful for themselves.
- We are all God’s children and should help each other, when ever possible.
- I will love and cherish my children, and teach them to respect themselves as well.
- I have to love myself before I can expect anyone else to love me.
These are just a few statements that you could make all you need to do is add others that you can think of. Listen to the statements you hear in your head; what other positive ones in which are the negative ones. Write down all these negative statements you hear in your head, and then rewrite them so they are positive ones, and then repeat them until you change your thought processes and mindset.
Davida Shensky is a professional speaker, trainer, and author of many E-Books and articles. Her specialty is helping clients reach their maximum potential in life and create their own success in life. She has written the book No One Stands in Line to Become Disabled. Through her company Career Performance Institute she offers offers teleseminars, webinars, mentoring programs or bootcamps, advocacy, career, life, organizational, and technology coaching.
She holds an AAS in Mental Health and BA in Psychology and attended a Masters program in Rehabilitation Counseling. She attended Toastmasters where she received both the CTM and ATM certifications and participated in the NSA-GA Chapter mentoring program. She attended the American Seminar Leaders Association University where she recived the Certified Seminar Leader (CSL) certification. She attended Stores Online presentation to learn about Internet Marketintg. She has used her real life experiences to established a NPO–International Disabled Entrepreneurs, Inc. (IDE, Inc.) to teach people with disabilities the skills needed to have their own business, resources on where to purchase equipment, and low interest loans.
Ms. Shensky’s company is Career Performance Institute through which she presents teleseminars, webinars, boot camps, advocacy, career, technology organizational, and life coaching, plus written the book No One Stands in Line to Become Disabled. 1personalcareercoach.com